the beginning: poor decision-making, living without Christ, or both

Well, let me preface this by a little history.  It seems that as long as I can remember, I had always been looking for someone to love me.  Sure, I was picky.  Yes, I had standards-some.  I was educated, and easy to look at.  Unfortunately, for me and everyone else, I decided to do things MY way, instead of looking to God.  (You can see where all this is headed) While I was in language school for the Army, I met a handsome guy who just made me melt .  He told me that he was married, but getting a divorce.  Yes, I was young, extremely naïve, so I believed everything he told me.  I even believed it when he told me he loved me.  I was in love, head-over-heels.  I got pregnant, and all of a sudden, he had to stay with his wife, and on and on.  He even wanted a paternity test!  I was so hurt, but yes, I deserved everything I was getting and more to come.  He did end up paying child support for three years until I met another man while stationed in Texas.  My husband felt it was his duty to adopt my daughter so that she could have a father.  I thought, “Oh wow!  This is it!  My daughter, who had a “socially-embarrassing” medical disability, will have a father in her life, and one who has money!”  Her biological father was more than happy to give up his parental rights and the adoption went through.  Again, I was naïve.  I realized that my husband literally hated my daughter.  As the years went on, his emotional abuse became almost daily.  He yelled at her, told her how she disgusted him, excluded her from areas in the home because of the gases her body gave out due to her disability.  I was a referee for years.  I was afraid if I left, not only would he take our other daughter, but I would not be able to afford to give them the life they were both accustomed to and deserved (in my opinion).  Your classic abusive situation.  Finally, after 13 years, he filed for a divorce.  Although I was scared, I was also very happy.   I had a little bit of child support, my teaching salary, our home, and we were now safe.


About babybear65

I am a Hispanic single woman, born and raised in the military lifestyle. Went on to become a veteran and an Army spouse. Throughout my life I have struggled with relationships, to include the most important, the one with my Father, God. I am currently working as a high school counselor, but am a Licensed Professional Counselor, and studying to take the Addictions Counselor exam for my LCDC. I want to help, encourage, and maybe through my many mistakes, help others, men and women.
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